Favoritism

We all have something that we’re in favor of whether it’s a color, number, car, hobby or even a person. For the most part it’s some type of material object that usually doesn’t hurt anyone such as a number or color. But what happens when it’s a person? Someone at work who’s your manager’s favorite or even someone above the manager and this can be because they look a certain way, think alike or worse, know them at a personal level. So no matter what you do or how hard you work and education or degrees you have under your built, this person will basically shine more than you. You put in the extra hours, you constantly show this person how to do their job since they were hired out of favoritism in which you and everyone else knows they’re not fit for the job yet they still seem to get credit and appreciated for things while you’re in their shadow. Sucks doesn’t it?

Now imagine that same feeling of never meeting to someone’s expectation at home, with your family! What if no matter what you did and how much you try to succeed in life, one of your parents or worse both parents always expect the worst. Seems to be a common scenario and it’s unfortunate actually. I was always told that I’m the favorite yet this is something I never asked for or wanted. How they would do anything for me yet I was independent since I was able to work and get my own things. I tried working before I was allowed to work simply because I wanted to buy my own things with my earnings. Kids nowadays expect things for no reason at all. They’re soft! Is that their fault? No, of course not because the parent(s) raised them to be a marshmallow, giving them a hundred reasons not to do things because they might get a scratch on their precious flimsy malnourished body. Some families treat their girls how boys should be treated and boys like girls by giving them everything they want and doing everything for them. Everything seems to be backwards to the point that kids don’t even know what bathroom to use and these pathetic stories are being eaten up by the media and it’s allowed. Parents yell at their kids for misbehaving or throwing a tantrum because for the first time in their mindless life they’re asked to do something, but that very same parent goes out rioting because they didn’t get the President they wanted or perhaps someone, that they didn’t know at all, was shot for committing a crime while armed and they feel that’s injustice towards their race. Really? This is what kids have to look up to, these selfish role models we have as parents.

On top of the nonsense and stupidity many parents are doing which already damages kids understanding of right and wrong, let’s add favoritism to the board. Your kid already has issues knowing what to do since you contradict what you tell them and actually show them. I mean, it’s one thing if you don’t like kids for your own reasons so why not make sure you don’t have any by surgery or taking the necessary precautions. Now you have someone who does like kids and starts a soccer team of kids or have a couple if that’s what they decide. Why the favorite though? You had X amount of kids, can’t say they were all accidents at this point, so you obviously wanted them and like kids. What determines like one kid more from the other? Their gender? If you like kids, then you should like either boy or girl equally. Is it something physical from the outside or something internal? You do realize that either way you look at it, this is a human being that you decided to make knowing that he/she might turn out just like you or your partner or perhaps someone in the family! If you feel that this child you created isn’t as smart as you then perhaps you didn’t show them the things that you know.

Just like everyone and everything, you learn by being taught and you didn’t learn the things you were taught on your own. Someone else showed you what you know and who knows, perhaps they thought the same about you. Damn, this kid is as dumb as door knob! Years later, you’re doing the same thing to your kid because you don’t want to do what your parents did to you right? Don’t do to  others what you don’t want to be done to you is what you show kids, yet here you are treating your kids like crap because they don’t meet up to your expectations. Perhaps they’re set too high or perhaps you didn’t meet them yourself when you were a child but then you fall back on your own words on doing what was done to you. How about that? In the end, however many kids you have, they’re a reflection of what you created. Your very own Frankenstein that you designed with someone else. If they are smart or dumb, pretty or ugly, thin or fat, male or female…you made a decision on bring that human being to the world. So why favor one over the other? They didn’t decide to be created, you did! Why bend over backwards for one child giving and doing everything that child for no reason, while the other who’s more than likely seeking out for your attention, gets the minimal attention or help? Do you even realize that the one you ignore probably worships the ground you walk on while “your favorite” takes advantage of you because they know they can get whatever they want from you, yet doesn’t give a shit on what happens to you because you raised a selfish prick who expects nothing less from everyone. They want to be treated like a King or Queen because that’s what the parents showed them right before they want to that riot.

What happens when you get old and can’t do nothing on your own anymore? Do you think that this monster you created will come help you when in need or will they still expect you to do everything for them? More than likely they will come back around ONLY when they need something from you. If you can’t provide they leave and perhaps next time will be to collect from your will when you pass! How about the “outcast” or “blacksheep” you treated like shit throughout their life? Guess who’s going to be there next to you when you need help, the one to uplift you and hold your hand when sick or on your deathbed. Of course that’s if they didn’t go into depression because you were such a lousy parent that you couldn’t love all your kids equally.

I don’t think anyone in their right mind says “I want to have a dysfunctional, broken up family where we all loathe each other.” For the most part we want to be together, spend holidays with each other and who doesn’t want to see at the very least, everyone united when taking our last breath. Can we honestly expect this when dividing the family by having a favorite? I don’t think that will be the case and in fact there will be hatred, regret and resentment. Imagine being on your deathbed and thinking back of all the things you could’ve done differently with that selfish prick of a child and distraught other. Why go through it to begin with and not just equally cherish what you created and treat them all equally. Help them all equally and discipline them all the same way. Parenting isn’t easy and it never will be, if you truly want to be a good parent of course. Not saying I’m a good father or I can give advice on being a good parent but at the same time I’m not going to do what most parents are doing now and wondering why this new generation is destroying everything. That’s your own fault, not the TV you bought them or the video game you allowed them to play because again, YOU bought it for them! Don’t blame them for your mistake, own up to it.

Just North of Miami

Starting off, I’d like to thank Glenn Holcomb for the title which of course opens up the next idea. 

Recently ( I mean a few months ago by now) I relocated to a small city West of Orlando from Miami called Clermont. I have to say living in Miami was an experience and not much in a good way. The majority of the people are rude, disrespectful, uneducated and certainly don’t know how to drive. For the most part, the streets and expressways are always under construction and sometimes if the street was smooth at some point, they make sure it isn’t anymore. Doesn’t make sense but I guess that’s what they feel like doing if they have extra funds presumably. The new trend for them is putting these ridiculous roundabouts which will cost them about a million to make due to all the work put into such as lights, sprinklers, decoration such as some unrelated to the area design or perhaps a hideous looking tree. For the most part I feel these roundabouts generally cause more traffic and trust me there is so much of that there it’s making it unbearable to live at.

Visiting Miami is perhaps ideal but keep in mind you will need extra time on your visitation since you’ll be spending lots of it in traffic. Where people have accidents all year round no matter the weather condition or time of day. Where people put their left turn signal and make a right or vice versa and get upset at you for honking or flashing your lights at them if they haven’t slammed into your car yet still blame you for their careless driving. In the end, you’ll end up with the ticket because common sense isn’t so common there and this includes with the laws and those who “enforce” them. Of course this doesn’t apply for everyone either but unfortunately those very few talented and intellectual individuals are stuck amongst the species that can bring humanity to an extinct if they had it their way. It’s unfortunate that being stupid isn’t illegal! It should be…there should be an IQ test for those who actually want to live in certain areas or come into the country. But I guess that’s what happens when you’re too busy trying to make the city “pretty” and not spend the funds on education. People rather look good on the outside than on the inside as well. They rather scam their way into getting that fancy car or house than actually learning something and earning it the right way.

I’ll admit doing things the right way is extremely difficult especially if you want to make a name for yourself but if getting rich or hitting that goal in life was easy then everyone would be doing it. So of course, it’s much faster to take the easy route and for many that’s doing something illegal, unethical and perhaps inhumane. I’ve had my time when younger when I did things that were wrong. It was quick and easy to do and didn’t take me to be a rocket scientist in doing the things I did. The idea at the time of doing those things were simply to get by and through the financial burden I was in. I had a crappy job, left the roof I was under with the clothes on my back and had no car. Making minimum wage and wanting a place to live and a car to get me from point A to B wasn’t going to happen in a very long time. So I did what I needed to in order to expedite the process and once I got those things, I remained doing things the hard way, the right way, but the hard way. Eventually I needed more because I am one who likes to learn more things in order to move forward, so I went to school again.

School. The one thing I disliked and I went back to it. What was I thinking right? Several years ago that was what most places wanted you to do, get a degree. So basically put yourself in a lifelong debt to work for someone else so they can give you a raise just to get by but not enough to pay those loans back. How ironic is that! How many have made the mistake to go to school to learn more, end up owing 50-100k or more so they can make 30-60k just to make that impression and then you end up working with someone who either makes the same amount or more without a school debt simply because they know someone on the inside. Sometimes that lucky bastard end up moving up faster because of it and maybe even become your manager. Thankfully that hasn’t been my case but I’ve heard of things like that. Luck of the draw I presume.

So here I am, relocated about 240 miles north of the torturous ways of Miami, wondering, what’s so different? OK, yes the people are much friendlier than Miami. I give it that much. I thought at first I was being trapped into something or the person wanted something in return on how kind they were but turns out, that’s not the case. Driving is much less than in Miami even though, patience is a major factor. Wow do people drive slow here but I guess I’m just used to that fast pace Miami always has or pretends to have considering you end up doing 2-10mph on the highway anyways. Now cost of living to me feels about the same if you live in an apartment. Yes prices are much lower for homes if you’re out to buy one but if  not then you’re in the same boat. I feel the majority of houses should be less if they’re built like gingerbread houses with simply all wood instead of cinderblocks.

How about businesses? This is where I feel I got the short end of the stick. Small businesses here are slowly being and going to be pushed out by franchises. People don’t want to pay the same amount as Miami people are willing to pay but yet the price to have a business storefront is the same, rent is the same, utilities are basically the same. In other words, people are cheap when it comes to pay for quality service yet wonder why the local business has been closed. People need to wake up though because if all small business are closed and pushed out by franchises, the there will be no other option but pay the high priced franchise is charging. This applies for all sorts of businesses too. You’ll be eating $20 frozen food dishes, $70 oil changes, $120 pc repairs etc. all simply because you weren’t willing to support a small business with their $10-$15 homemade food or $20 oil change to mechanic or $60 computer repair service done at your house for 2-3 hours. You were cheap! I get you don’t want to spend hundreds of dollars or you need to save money for whatever reason. If you don’t want to spend that kind of money on food then eat at home, don’t want to do the usual maintenance that a vehicle requires then don’t buy one to begin with and the same applies to computers and everything else that requires some type of managing. Nothing is perfect, you can’t just buy something and not expect something to happen. If Humans aren’t perfect then what makes you think we can make something perfect? Obviously we can’t nor will we so stop bitching and complaining how something happened to your 10 year old purchase. It’s more understandable to ask for a discount or assistance on a service that cost over $100 but to ask for a discount on a service that was $20-50 is like going to dollar store and wanting a coupon or discount for absolutely no reason at all. No barter, no referral, no reason, no discount! That’s how I see it and how I feel it should be. Just like everyone else, owners of small businesses have to eat and pay their own bills as well. They probably have a school debt or small business loan and if they give everyone discounts or things away for free, they won’t pay any of it back and business will fail. Be considerate of those trying to do what they can with what little they can offer!